Friday, March 21, 2008

Pursuing Mrs. Regrets - Ch. 17.2

Delia made it home way before her children awakened. That was not the case with her mother. Valena was up and sitting at the kitchen table with a magazine and a cup of coffee in front of her, clearly waiting to have a long overdue conversation with her daughter.

“Good morning, Mama,” Delia said, heading to the fridge with the gallon of milk in her hands.

“Good morning to you, too, Dee,” Valena replied. “Now if we’re done with the pleasantries, you mind telling me where you’re really coming from this time of morning? Because I know it don’t take that long to get milk from the grocery store, even if you had to go all the way across town to get it.”

Delia’s cheeks flushed with color. If she was still a mischievous teenager, she might have been inclined to add to her earlier half-truth. But since she was a grown woman with children of her own and since she was trying to stay in the integrity zone in every area of her life, she told her mother the whole truth.

“I did go to the grocery store, Mama…after I spent the evening with a male friend,” Delia confessed, closing the refrigerator door. She removed the brief note she’d left on it announcing her late night errand.

Valena didn’t even look surprised. “I figured as much. I knew all those secret smiles, dreamy looks, and the constant using of your cell phone after hours weren’t for nothing.”

“Dang. I didn’t know I’d been so obvious.” Delia sat down beside her mother at the round table.

“Oh, yeah.” Valena chuckled. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were in love.”

“I’m not looking to love anybody’s son but my own ever again,” Delia replied, not confirming or denying her mother’s assessment.

“Sometimes it happens anyway,” Valena said, sprouting a ton of wisdom in that statement. “As for this male friend of yours, when are we going to meet him? Or are you going to keep letting him treat you like some skank that he can only see at night?”

“He doesn’t treat me like a skank,” Delia defended, careful not to call Royal’s name. She wasn’t ready for her mother to know that she was sleeping with her ex-doctor. And she definitely didn’t want Charlize to know.

Valena scoffed. “He’s treating you like something since I seriously doubt you’re meeting this man so late at night just to stare at the moon.”

“Actually, he wants a real relationship,” Delia explain. “I’m the hold up. I’m the one that’s not ready for anything serious.”

“I see. Have you told him that yet?” Valena took a sip of her coffee.

“Yes, but he insists on loving me anyway. I told him not to,” Delia replied.

Valena almost choked on her coffee at those words. She swallowed hard, took a deep breath and got her bearings back before responding. “Dee, you can’t tell a man not to fall in love with you and still give him your body. That’s sending mixed messages. His feelings are only going to get deeper the more you sleep with him.”

“Well, what do you suggest I do?” Delia asked, clasping her hands in front of her on the oak wood table.

“I suggest you either allow this man to love you properly or not at all. Don’t play with his emotions with all these mixed messages. Not only is that unfair to him, it can be dangerous for you if he decides he loves you too much to let you go,” Valena said, speaking from experience.

“You’re right. I’m going to stop seeing him. I’ll let him know today,” Delia decided. If only that decision didn’t come with so much pain. It was like losing her father and E-Blade all over again. How was that possible? Had Royal come to mean so much to her already?

“Good girl.” Valena smiled with approval. “I’m glad you’re being so adult about this. But I’m curious. Why did you choose to stop seeing him over just letting him love you? Is he good in bed, yet with major character flaws? Is he a cheater like E-Blade was?”

Delia shook her head. “No, he is handsome, educated, established in his career, has no baby-mama drama, owns his own house, loves kids, and loves me, despite my past.”

Valena’s eyes widened. “Are you sure you want to give up a man like that? He seems perfect in every way.”

Delia sighed heavily. “That’s the thing, Mama. He’s too perfect for me. A woman like me doesn’t deserve a man like that.”

“What do you mean a woman like you?” Valena looked offended that her daughter would even say something like that about herself. “You’re a wonderful mother, daughter, and friend. A great businesswoman.”

Delia smiled at her mother. “I appreciate you saying that, Mama, but no matter how wonderful I am, I could never be good enough for this man.”

“Is this man the Pope or something?”

“No.” Then Delia took a deep breath and told her mother exactly who the mystery man was. “He’s Dr. Royal Seeger, one of Charlize’s bosses. The same doctor that delivered Tess.”

Valena gasped in shock. Her cheeks went from pale to flaming red. “Oh, Dee, how could you?” Extreme disappointment settled firmly upon her face. Fear, too, since she knew that dating such a high-profile doctor would create a certain amount of media attention that none of them needed or wanted. Isn’t that one of the main reasons they left Enfield? Would they have to pack up and leave London Bridge now, too?

Delia hung her head in shame. “I didn’t plan to, Mama. It just happened one night. And then it wouldn’t stop happening. In a way, I didn’t want it to stop. But now I do. Now I’m willing to do what’s best for everybody.” She stood to her feet.

Before leaving the room, Delia requested that what she’d just shared be kept between the two of them. She didn’t want anyone else to know of her shame.

Speechless now, Valena only nodded.

As Delia walked to her room with heavy footsteps, she felt even more ashamed of herself. Even more guilty. It pained her to know that she’d grieved her mother’s heart yet again. When was she going to get it right? What was it going to take to actually be someone that her mother and kids could be proud of?

Who could ever be proud of a murderous skank, Delia mused, mentally kicking herself for behaving so stupidly all these months. For once again making such bad choices.

I need help! Delia mused, opening the door to her bedroom. Maybe it’s time for me to try God after all, she thought, recalling those words from a recent phone conversation with her Christian friend and home-girl Alexis. Maybe He can keep me from making all these stupid mistakes in my life.

“Yes,” Delia declared with her mind firmly made up. She would give God a try. Today.

But first I need to take another shower, Delia mused, unaware that God would accept her just the way she was right now, despite the stench of sin upon her.

© 2008 by Suprina Frazier


Paula said...

Please explain to me why her mother did that?

She should have been happy that her daughter is giving love a try with a SRUMPDILIOCIOUS of a man name Dr. Royal Seeger. Please inform us why her mother is acting so disappointed.

Suprina said...

Paula: Great question. The answer is a complicated one and will be addressed in future posts.

Valena is disappointed because Delia slept with her doctor for one thing. That she crossed those boundaries after Charlize had gone to bat for her to even see the man at all. Had it been any other man than her friend's boss (a popular doctor in the area), she wouldn't have minded so much.

Plus, when even though Valena received financial help from E-Blade (a drug dealer) while he was alive, before her and Delia left Enfield it was agreed that this new move would be the beginning of a lot of new things.

1. The 2 women would no longer rely on any man to help them. They would help each other come up in life.

2. They would make better choices in men. Valena wouldn't date any more abusive men. Delia would date any more drug dealers and men of ill-repute.

3. There would be no more scandals for the sake of the kids. Having heard all about the esteemed Dr. Seeger and how well-known he is in the area, Valena knows that if Delia openly dates this man, it could ruin the man's upward mobility in his career and it could put the spotlight back on the Valentine family. Which means Delia and the kids would be exposed to negative media attention all over again.

Hope that explains things.


Paula said...

Thanks that explains a lot.

Suprina said...

Paula: Go back and read it again. I added a little more to Valena's 'gasp of shock' paragraph, which should clear things up for everybody.

Thanks for keeping me on my toes.

Okay, off to finish writing Delia's salvation scene. Then there's that dreaded call to Royal to say goodbye. Dang. I sure dread what's coming next. Especially after that beautiful night together.

Anyhoo...I'll try to post more soon.


Suprina said...

I need to slow down a bit because I'm starting to make too many careless mistakes. In my earlier response to Paula, I meant to say that Delia would NOT date anymore drug dealers and men of ill-repute.

Sorry, y'all. Blame it on the lingering effects of the head cold.


Anonymous said...

the post with Royal was beautiful ya'know?

i am just so happy our gurl is about to get her some real lovin' from the BEST MAN eva'...Jesus-Christ. can't wait to read up on that...

soooo dreading the breakup that is coming up???

and thank you also for the explanations on Valena because i didn't understand why her mother acted in so unsupportive a way???!!! eve if they did agree on that stuff, she could have been more...wiliing to listen-let Delia expand more on what she is going thru instead of judging and condemning the "relationship" so quickly?? sigh...

hope your cold heals up quickly, i hate colds too!!


Suprina said...

Sharon: Valena reacted out of fear. She is scared for her daughter's mental and emotional well-being if Delia's past is thrown to the forefront again. The whole family was tormented by the media in Enfield. Valena does not want a repeat in their new town.

Thanks for the well-wishes.